BOYCOTT Left 4 Dead 2! Says these people…

June 6, 2009

Seems there’s some offended individuals angry at Valve for wanting to make money by releasing a sequel to the very enjoyable Left 4 Dead. Instead of being ecstatic, they all banded together to create what will ultimately be a worthless endeavour – a group calling for a L4D2 boycott! There’s already almost 12,000 whiners! It’s like watching a smaller, fatter, more pathetic version of the civil rights movement, only without any of its significance and none of its hygiene.



Nintendo conference is GO!

June 2, 2009

And I won’t be here to watch it. Life beckons and watching Reggie brag about how awesome Nintendo is isn’t exactly high on list of priorities. I have a prediction of how the Nintendo press conference will go:

  • Reggie and/or that stupid lady from last year brags.
  • Bullshit game reveal that’s not as good as they think.
  • Pie charts and graphs detailing why they deserve to brag.
  • Bullshit casual game.
  • More bragging.
  • Embarassing demonstration of bullshit casual games.
  • More bragging.
  • Miyamoto introducing his newest inspiration – mowing grass!
  • Bragging.
  • Maybe an okay looking Conduit trailer and gameplay.
  • Bullshit casual game.
  • Reggie dances.
  • Everyone leaves unsatisfied.

New Lunar screens

May 16, 2009
I get all old man whenever I talk about Lunar

I get all old man whenever I talk about Lunar

Apparently the PSP is getting its own version of Lunar Silver Star Story, of which the Playstation version was my all time favourite game for any platform. Despite horrible graphics and severely outdated gameplay, I just couldn’t help but love the charm the game exuded. It, and its sequel Eternal Blue, were also one of the few games that I bothered to hang onto just for nostalgia’s sake. I’ll probably never play the games ever again, but those hunkin $100 collector editions will forever be in my gaming collection.

Famitsu’s website posted images of the updated PSP game and I have to admit it looks damn good. Let’s just hope they don’t fuck up the story or music, both of which are integral. In case you’re allergic to Japanese, the images are also below. It lacks the charm of the original, what with its fancy schmancy new technology, but it looks to be a good entry for those who haven’t played the Lunar games yet. I’d also prefer a sequel instead of a fourth remake, but whatever.

Did I mention the Lunar games are fucking awesome?

Read the rest of this entry »

Beyond Good and Evil 2 footage?

May 8, 2009
My most anticipated game ever

My most anticipated game ever

Kotaku put up a video found on a no name French website that has a woman dressed an awful lot like Jade in the BG&E2 teaser here.

I’ll say it right now – this footage looks incredible. Now, the only thing debatable is if the footage is in fact from the game at all. It did come out of nowhere and Ubisoft hasn’t commented on it yet. If it is from the game, then hot damn we have a potential game of the year candidate. If it isn’t? Then some fans have a lot of time and talent on their hands and Ubisoft should hire these guys if they’re interested.

Please let this be true.

Please let this be true.


The new Microsoft Xii?

May 1, 2009

xbox-sensorbar-001What’s great about not wasting time watching what is most likely a subpar movie is that I suddenly have some time to write an epic blog post! Okay, that’s a lie. A dirty, disgusting, shave your hair off kind of lie.

Anyways…Engadget just leaked a potentially major story. Apparently Microsoft is seeking to reinvent the way we plays games and blah, blah, blah. You’ve heard the same line from each console company ad nausea over the decades. So, what’s Microsoft’s super-duper-cooper-pooper plan? A sensor bar! From the future! Now!

Apparently it’s like the Wii sensor bar, only you are the Wiimote! Huh. I highly doubt this news leak is anywhere close to accurate as to what that little white bar actually is. If it is right, then again I say – huh. I play games on my 360, with my controller, on my TV. This is the 360’s purpose to me. It’s fulfilled that obligation faithfully, with only one casualty over the last 3 and a half years. The Wii already has the casual market on its stomach, a big fat Miyamoto cock up its ass. I doubt this full body motion controller is going to be making very much headway into that forum.

Get over it Microsoft. You aimed the 360 as a hardcore gaming brand. To associate it with the geek/nerd/dweeb/drunken-frat-douchebag demographic. You’ve more than succeeded, but in doing so you gave up any chance of mainstream inroads.

Pimp Miyamoto does not let his bitches go easy.

A few thoughts on FFXIII

April 27, 2009
It's sooo purdy!

It's sooo purdy!

With the storm surrounding the recently released FFXIII demo settling, I finally took a few minutes (or three hours) to sit down and just watch the deluge of media online. Sadly, without a PS3 or the desire to import a longer version of Advent Children I was left watching other people play a demo. Kind of sad, when you think about it. Oh well.

So, what did I think. Strangely enough, as a gigantic Final Fantasy fan having looked forward to this for three years now, I felt a sort of disconnect and not a small bit of disappointment. In a nutshell:

The Good:

  • The graphics a damn pretty. Probably the very best I’ve ever seen come out of Japan as of yet. Not as meticulous as MGS4, no, but there’s a certain flow to the faces and body movements that’s just damn fluid.
  • Really well made CGI and cinematics. The facial details are astounding, as are the background details and artistry.
  • It’s FF!

The Bad:

  • I still hate the ‘Japanese’ motion capture of it all. It’s simply a difference in acting philosophies between the east and west. Japanese mo-cap is just too jittery, having the heads and shoulder constantly moving and bobbing. It’s annoying. People in real life don’t move that way, including the Japanese, so I don’t know why they bring it into their games.
  • Maybe games like Elder Scrolls and Fallout III have just spoilt me, but does anyone sense the demo being rather…restrictive? I know, that’s how every FF is made, but I would have figured they’d taken a step forward. FFXII was a real jump ahead for the series, so its disheartening seeing them reel it all back.
  • The battle system, like the level design, seems a step backwards from the real time nature of FFXII. I loved XII’s free flowing gambits and no-load nature, while XIII is taking a piece out of Chrono Cross and the Tales’ series’playbook. Nothing against those other games (amongst my favourite JRPGs), but FF is supposed to be a flagship series to lead the way, not copy the competition.

The Ugly:

Uh huh.

Uh huh.

  • I have never, ever, liked a black character in a Japanese game. They are always eastern interpretations of stereotypes, and in a way just feel iffy. I know there’s no malicious intent, more an enthused ignorance, but that still doesn’t change the fact that black character + Japanese development = most likely terrible.

New Battletoads game!

April 26, 2009


My goodness, I’ve waited my adult life for this game. And look, photo realistic graphics! Now with 120% more lobster knife fighting!

You don't bring claws to a knife fight!

You don't bring claws to a knife fight!