The horror. The horror.
I was never against Rob Zombie’s initial remake of Halloween. I felt it wasn’t needed because the original withstood the test of time remarkably well, but I make it a point to never discriminate against horror remakes. Sometimes you get something better than the original – The Ring being a prime example.
Now, I wasn’t exactly a Zombie fan. In fact, I still don’t quite understand how he’s built so much muscle in the horror arena amongst producers and fans alike. House of 1,000 Corpses was a disaster and The Devil’s Rejects was just a smidgen below mediocre. Neither were made well enough to exactly be unnerving, which is what a good horror movie should do.
Still, I was curious what this guy would do with a personal favourite of mine. At the very least it’d be fun, right? Well, he took Halloween and he tried to humanize Michael Meyers. Huh. Wasn’t the original concept of the kid simply being evil good enough? I know it freaked me out as a kid, just having this other kid kill his family for no reason. Zombie’s Myers? Abused and neglected as a kid, just like every other stereotypical serial killer in a thousand other movies. Didn’t Zombie know the best cinematic murderers are those you simply can’t explain? Not only that, Zombie made a movie that not only mimicked the original, it even felt more amateur. With all this money and modern technology at his disposal, as well as his ‘go for broke’ reputation on gore, he actually managed to make a tamer movie than the original. Michael was as unmenacing as can be and I don’t remember any particularly creative kills.
And do teenagers really say the word ‘fuck’ that often within singular sentences?
It was confounding, really. He was given a clean slate to ‘reimagine’ the franchise, and he chose to copy the original. Only he made it worse and over explained everything, as if saying, “horror fans a naturally retarded, so here’s 40 minutes explaining why Michael kills people.”
But enough about the piece of crap that was the 2007 remake, let’s talk about the sequel, H2 (I swear, now he’s even copying a naming conceit of the series – remember H20?).
First, click here for the trailer and then come on back.
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