Just caught the first 10 minutes of Paris Hiltons BFF show…

We are all dumber for this

We are all dumber for this

…and I’m more retarded for it. The human race is more retarded for it. How this show exists and why people watch it boggles my mind. I’m also to believe this is the second season of Paris Hilton’s My New BFF which only depresses me even more.

Is it because Paris is hot? Because she’s one ugly person, both physically and mentally. I mean I get more turned on looking at fungus growing on a tree than I do Paris Hilton. Is it because she lives a glamorous lifestyle? Because all I see is a drug and alcohol filled stupor and venereal disease.

I get celebutantes and our fascination for them. Here are famous people that most others have nothing better to do than live vicariously through. Hell, I do that with George Clooney all the time. But I think there needs to be a differentiation between someone who is interesting, smart and glamorous and someone who is, well, Paris fucking Hilton. Kristen Stewart, despite her constantly greased up appearance and stoner eyes, at least worked her way to her position through quality acting and dedication. Hell, even Lindsey Lohan had to work for what she eventually pissed away. Paris Hilton was born with a silver spoon up her vagina and has a penchant for videotaped sex. She is a drunk, skanky, addict and really has very few redeeming qualities as a human being.

And yet millions of people watch her show weekly, and not just for ironic purposes (like I attempted and failed at doing) but because they legitimately adore Paris Hilton! Because they strive to be her! Because Paris Hilton is a role model. No wonder there are so many bitchy 16 year olds wanting Super Sweet 16s.

I really don’t blame the people. People are easily manipulated into wanting anything. Hell, I swerved on a street after seeing a billboard for Bud Light Lime so I can get to the Beer Store, and it sucked. But honestly, is there some kind of subliminal message being distributed around all the gossip rags and TMZs and Perez Hiltons forcing people to pay attention to Paris fucking Hilton? Because unlike a Bud Light Lime, Paris Hilton is an affront to human kind and all things decent.

As for the show – what..the..fuck? Paris Hilton picks friends on a reality show? There are actually people willing to humiliate themselves to be Paris Hilton’s fake best friend for a year? And I mean really want it? Because from what I can tell there isn’t a cash incentive for the lunacy, just a real desire to be close to their idol. It’s like watching an emotional snuff film.

I firmly believe this show has put humanity, and especially women, back a good century of advancement.

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8 Responses to Just caught the first 10 minutes of Paris Hiltons BFF show…

  1. She influences young minds into thinking that dumb is awesome. Please, somebody find a way to end her?

    • Sang says:

      No, ending someone is wrong. I’d much rather find a way to show people that aspiring to be mentally retarded is in itself MORE retarded. Of course, hopefully Darwinism will iron out these little details in due time without us resorting to murder.

      • Guuleed says:

        – Se5 flott! Hyggelig e5 se at du spilte pe5 hnnees ukulele, samt gav henne et signert plekter!Forse5vidt kjenner jeg jo at det hadde ve6rt hyggelig e5 eie et slikt flatpick selv, og jeg undrer pe5 om det er den typen flatpick du benytter.Uansett: Hvilken tykkelse er det pe5 det?Og; hvilket materiale er det laget i? Noe sier meg at det er et nylon-plekter.Selv sverger jeg til Dunlop .73 laget i nettopp nylon, som du sikkert vet ne5r det kommer til flatpicks, men jeg har ogse5 noen tynne .46 liggende.Det hadde seg nemlig slik at jeg en gang tenkte at slike tynne plektre jo me5tte ve6re perfekt for det jeg liker e5 kalle Cat Stevens-raspingen ; han har det jo ofte med e5 sle5 an noen raske sekstendels underdelinger er det vel her og der i flere av sangene sine. Virkningsfullt, er det!Men ja Hvis jeg treffer deg nok en gang; noe jeg liker e5 tro at jeg gjf8r, sier jeg jo ikke nei takk til et plekter med ditt navnetrekk pe5 til tross for at jeg jo har to eksemplarer av din autograf allerede Og; jeg skal si til Hiromi at det er gledelig e5 se at hun har sansen for deg – Pe5 gjensnakk!

  2. Well, I didn’t mean kill her. Just stop her from capitalizing on her own lack of intellect. Cutting off her legs and mangling her face would work. Then she might actually need to use her brain, instead of her “good looks” (she is fucking ugly).

  3. I want to watch the part in House of Wax where she gets killed by having a pole thrust into her mouth and out the back of her head. It was glorious.

  4. Jamar says:

    This is the reason I read geeksploit.com. Unbelievable post.

  5. Hello, Paris is a cool girl

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