Having the pleasure of watching tonight’s 24 finale a few hours early, here are some of my preliminary thoughts, strewn about with copious amounts of SPOILERS. So, continue reading after you watch it, or simply want to know the details. Hopefully not for villainous deeds like ruining it for your 24 fanboy buddies.
Would Jack Bauer ruin the season finale of his closest friends favourite TV series? Well, unless that friend is a suspected terrorist, no he wouldn’t. Be a Jack Bauer, not a Jackass. Of course, this is all your prerogative.
NOTE: Now that the season is over and done with, I guess this went from an early look to just a plain old opinion piece, though you can take it as a sort of written Mystery Science Theater 3000 for the finale.
- Man, why is Kim a fucking hostage every season she’s on? This is getting ridiculous. I swear, she’s a living plot device, not a character.
- Bauer hijacks the prison transport like only Jack can – by shooting a poor bastard in the leg and yelling. At least this time he actually tells Walker why he’s doing it, instead of leaving everybody out of the loop.
- Whoa, Tony wants to use Jack as a living Virus container? That’s pretty badass. “Dark” Tony is one evil motherfucker. I’m calling it, though. We already know Tony’s coming back next season so this has to be an act.
- Olivia figured out Kanin and Pierce’s plot because of the stupidest thing about movies/TVs – the unclosed door! What the hell? I was yelling at the screen for Kanin to close it tightly. Too bad Olivia’s too much of an idiot to see through the fake memory card rouse.
- Kim’s baby’s named Terry. That was a nice touch. Plus, Kim isn’t a fucking pushover anymore, getting out of the hostage situation herself. She even has her arm lit on fire and shrugs it off. Doesn’t quite make up for her past seasons’ ineptitude, but it sure goes a long way.
- Kim Bauer – “Damnit!” That’s daddy’s little girl!
- You know what villains should never do? Reveal their secret identity and then go to the fucking warehouse where Jack Bauer is being kept! That’s like committing suicide by way of retardation.
- Further proof its a stupid idea? Bauer goes from having a giant needle in his spine to slicing the throats and breaking the necks of the doctors that worked on him less than 15 minutes ago! Defenseless doctors that probably would’ve surrendered if given more than half a breath before he tore it out of them. While handcuffed! So just imagine what he’d do to you.
- Jack gets recaptured after a Tony Almeida karate kick and a gun butt to the head.
- Tony reveals it was just all a play at getting the big cheese to bite! I love it when I’m right, though it was obvious. Too bad for Larry Moss, still being dead and all.
- Alan Wilson is the name of the big bad behind Logan’s antics, Palmer’s assassination and Michelle’s death!
- Tony’s gone way off the tracks with his justice, tying dynamite to Jack to use as a living bomb to kill Wilson. So I guess Tony’s still evil, only in a different way.
- Like any Deus Ex Machina worth its salt, Walker and the FBI show up in an attack elevator just in time to save Jack before he, and the bomb on him, is handed over. Gotta love that convenient turn of events. Plus Walker just knows how to disarm the C4 on Jack in seconds. Wonderful.
- Tony is one cold son of a bitch, killing Cara point blank while she’s worrying about him. Super.
- Tony reveals that Michelle was pregnant with his son when she died. Man, now I kind of understand why he’s such a cold blooded bastard. Jack, you could’ve at least let him kill the fucker before shooting him twice and arresting him.
- Jack has a visitor at the hospital, and it’s…the Imam from the Mosque! Huh, not quite the person I expected.
- President Taylor goes through with having her daughter arrested, destroying her family in the process.
- Oh wait, here’s Kim now. The hour, and thus the season, ends with Renee Walker going completely over the edge and truly becoming Bauer’s protege and Kim agreeing to the experimental stem cell surgery. Two things that were pretty predictable, but effective none the less.
- I wonder if Kim’s youthful stem cells will bring back Jack stronger and faster than before.
- Renee: “Do you regret anything that you did today?”
- Jack: “No.”
A damn good finale to a damn good season. Yes, things kind of fell apart a little in the second half, but the finale makes up for with with a strong finish. Can’t wait for the next day to begin.