Jack Bauer charged for being a man


Which came first, Jack Bauer or Kiefer Sutherland. I don't know anymore.

Kiefer Sutherland was charged for misdemeanour assault for headbutting some douchebag fashion designer named Jack McCollough. What happened? Apparently McCollough shoved Brooke Shields and Kiefer, not one to let a woman be pushed around, laid the fucker out with a headbutt! That’s how you prove you’re a man.

Exact details for what happened at the Met Costume Institute Gala are contradicting, with actual eye witnesses seeing McCollough shove Shields to the ground while McCollough himself and Shields’ representatives saying nothing happened. I think I’ll take the words of witnesses that having nothing to gain.

This is all extremely badass for fans of Jack Bauer, but not so much for Kiefer seeing that he’s still currently on probation. If his probation is revoked, this may mean a delay for the next season of 24.

So what’s the lesson here? Do not be a scumbag fashion designer who shoves beautiful women around, and especially not be one when Jack fucking Bauer is attending the same party. Be a man and be respectful to women, or Kiefer Sutherland will crack your skull open.


7 Responses to Jack Bauer charged for being a man

  1. robby says:

    It doesn’t matter that Kiefer did the honorable thing. He should be smarter than this, knowing full well he was on fucking probation. There re better solutions than hudbutting the guy!

    • Sang says:

      Yessiry it was awfully stupid an act. But a more primal part of me is still screaming approval for Kiefer standing up to a bully. Well, an ALLEGED bully.

  2. Awesome. I think that he should just change his name to Jack in RL.

  3. Sometimes you need to be stupid to be bad ass…it’s a fine line you walk when you’re Kiefer Sutherland.

  4. Maybe Kiefer can star in an episode of Prison Break? or…well…restart the series. Prison Break: Sutherland Chronicles.

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