If you know me, you know I love The Flash. Because you don’t know me, I just told you so. I love every iteration of the Flash. From rusty ol’ Jay Garrick being all old, to Wally West being all family man, to Bart Allen being all killed. But above all the others, it’s Barry fucking Allen that stands head and shoulders above all else for me. He was the no-nonsense Flash that got shit done and sacrificed himself because that’s what you do. I’ve done it twice, which isn’t to take anything away from Barry.
I’m just saying.
Well here comes Mr. Robo-DC-Writer Geoff Johns, the continuity savant, to bring back one of the most iconic characters in human/CHUD history. We all know, I assume, that Barry came back during the mind fuck that was Final Crisis (Morrison’s masturbatory magnum opus), but even then he didn’t really seem very important until that one panel near the end. Well, Johns will have none of the Barry-marginalization. No, he gives Barry a five issue miniseries to rule all five issue miniseries (I’m looking at YOU Ultimatum).
So, how does issue numero uno (I’m international!) fare? It fares about as well as a 250 pound man beating a handicapped toddler – surprisingly well. Johns does his Johnsing. Every line of dialogue just feels important, and even though nothing really happens until the last two pages that nothing was still damned entertaining. Bendis wishes he could write this well.
(TANGENT: In fact, this is starting to really freak me out. How is it possible that Johns is writing, off the top of my head, four different series and still keep things so smooth and entertaining? I mean, it’s not like a bunch of his issues are just empty action scenes or anything. Just look at Legion of 3 Worlds – there’s more dialogue than pictures. I’m beginning to feel that Geoff Johns isn’t human. Which is too bad, because the day that news gets out I’m hunting you down Johns. Earth ain’t big enough for humans AND Geoff Johns)
The art is gorgeous, the little character bits are fascinating, and all in all Flash Rebirth lives up the hype building into it. I love how Barry just shrugs off the fact that he OUTRAN DEATH, and instead just wants to get right back into it and take down some criminal scum, his family and friends be damned.
Barry Allen is back, and he will stab you in the face (high five, Supernatural fans).
Rating: Two bolts of lightning and a bag of potato chips.